How to maintain a relationship with non-custodial children

Posted on Feb 7, 2017 by Christopher Pitts

According to 2013 census data, 22.1 children under 21 live with their custodial parent while the other parent lives elsewhere. Custody disputes are not uncommon following a separation or divorce. Even the most reasonable people may let the tension get the best of them, and this can often lead to long, drawn-out disputes. If you are in this situation, there are several things you can do to maintain a relationship with your noncustodial child in spite of the circumstances.

Stay in touch

One of the best ways to maintain a relationship with your child is to stay in touch with them. You can call, write, email or utilize a combination of these to stay in contact with your kid and let her or him know you are always there. Let your children know they are always able to reach out to you, too, if they want to talk or share important news. Communication is vital to the relationship.

Establish a support system

If you are serious about maintaining a relationship with your kids in spite of obstacles such as lack of custody, you will likely need a support system to help you do so. Be sure to surround yourself with people who will support you in your efforts and encourage you. It will likely be difficult, so this is certainly not a factor you should underestimate.

Go the extra mile

When you do not have custody of your children, you are likely to see them less often than you would like. To compensate for this, it is a good idea to go the extra mile and show your kids how much you love them regardless of how much time you may be able to spend with them. You can do this by doing something special or taking trips when you do get to see them.

Foster civility with your ex

One of the most effective ways to maintain a relationship with your children after losing custody is to foster one with your ex. They will likely control much of the interaction you have with your child, so if you want to be able to remain a part of your child’s life, being civil with your ex is essential. Put aside your differences and communicate that your biggest priority is your child.

Maintaining a relationship with your noncustodial child is difficult, but it can be done. If you are interested in learning about the legal options you have, you should contact a lawyer.